Setting a word of the year ruined my life

Storytime with Ruby

In January 2020 I had everything I thought I wanted: a dream job owning a successful yoga studio, getting to do what I loved every day, a team of best friends. I was in a stable relationship, had built a strong community, and I liked myself. There were things I didn’t like, but I thought: ‘Doesn’t everyone have those?’

My journey to get there started in college. A new friend invited me to yoga. It’s hard to explain how something so small could mean so much, but that first class rerouted my life. Two years later, still a college student, I became a yoga teacher. During my yoga teacher training we were asked to choose an intention for the training. I chose Love, and I leaned in hard. I appreciated the energy I got from choosing a single word. A clear direction revealed itself, and I was hooked. I kept Love as my intention for the rest of the year, and when January 1 rolled around I chose a new word.

I kept choosing words. In 2015 I chose the word Expansive. I thought it meant I’d get a fresh start in a new place and become a reincarnated version of myself. Los Angeles Ruby. I did move to L.A., but I was lonely and depressed and the opportunity I moved there for fell through. Not knowing what to do, I called my boyfriend one day in early July, and I said, “I can’t do this anymore. I’m not happy. I’m breaking my lease, and I’m moving in with you in two weeks. You should call a house cleaner.” He lived in Athens, Georgia. So my sister flew out to meet me, and we drove back across the country for the second time that year. Not what I had in mind when I imagined my year of Expansive.

By the time 2020 rolled around, I had seven years of experience choosing words. I wanted something bold and sure. I chose Moxie (force of character, determination, or nerve). Little did I know what was coming…

Don’t worry, I won’t get into all the ways 2020 ruined our lives collectively; I imagine just reading this gives you a little unwelcome flashback. But my word, Moxie, really put the icing on the cake.

Unrelated to the pandemic (?) People seemed to be on their worst behavior. There were little signs everywhere, pointing to what was to come.

Fueled by therapy, a lot of tears, and Moxie, I self-detonated my life. All in the span of about 2 months I broke up with my boyfriend, moved out, started dating again, met my husband, began exploring a way out of my business, saw the beginning of the end of several friendships…

The life I had been so close to, so reasonably content with, at the beginning of the year didn’t exist anymore by 2021. Moxie ruined that life, set it on fire and flipped it upside down.

Thank God.

It only takes one word to transform a moment, a year, a lifetime. To ruin things. It’s short and simple and draws you back to center. It pops into your mind when you’ve forgotten all about it and supports you in ways you do and don’t expect.

When I think back honestly, every word I’ve ever chosen has ruined my life in some way. And I’d choose it all again.

What about you? Have you ever been transformed by one word? Tell me about it! I’d love to hear from you.

May our intentions ruin the lives we thought we knew in order to show us who we really are.

I see you. I love you. You’re Doing Great.
Ruby