A How To Guide to Winning at Therapy

Storytime With Kate

Eww we're in the theme of Boundaries in the 2023 Self Study Program.

This is the 3rd year of the Self Study Program and every year I get a new challenge around boundaries. It feels like the universe keeps gently up-leveling my need for boundaries. I'll get some cute practice, and then a more challenging opportunity comes my way...

Right now, there's some tomfoolery, some total fuckery going down around me. There's mental illness involved, there's alcoholism... and then there's the part that makes all of this harder: I care about this person's well being and I'm generally inclined to believe people when they tell me something.

And those two things combined, my want to help and my inclination for trust, make for a perfect entry to me getting gaslit and confused.

This is where my opportunity for boundaries has just been up-leveled. Because I've been swept up by people like this before, but this time I see it, and I don't want it to happen again so I've got one option: do things differently. 

I know this is going to make you want to roll your eyes because it makes ME want to roll my eyes but I'm gonna say it: it's an opportunity for growth 🙃

We love an opportunity don't we?! 🫠

It's ok to roll your eyes and grow anyway

Because, I'm about to brag. Like totally show off -

• in a way that I hope is relatable (you: "omfg I love it when I'm also winning at therapy" or "wow yes my dream ✨"),
• in a way that's inspiring (you: "ok I've been reading emails from Kate Moore for 10 years and I guess sometimes it does take like 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, lifetimes to make progress on this one thing that keeps taking me OUT. I'm right on time"),
• and in a way where you maybe feel so inclined to respond to this email and be like, "Go Kate Go! Love this for you!!"

Anyway, here it is:

Today, my therapist goes, "I'm just feeling this sense of Clarity ✨ right now"

YALL IF YOU'VE BEEN GETTING THESE EMAILS FOR THE LAST YEAR THEN YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT'S UP AND THAT MY WORD OF THE YEAR IS CLARITY ✨

I'm winning at therapy. That's my point. Winning.

And by winning I mean that I'm getting out of it what I want. My hard work is paying off :) This year, I wanted to feel more clear. Less knotted up, tied up in a little ball, muddy, chaotic, and more organized, more simplified, more flowing, more loving: clear.

To have that so explicitly reflected back to me, by someone who's sat in it with me, who's witnessed it, who's stayed, who's helped me get out... is truly remarkable.

Through therapy, Self Study coaching, movement, or through friends, family, strangers... I hope that you have felt seen recently by.. anyone. I hope that you remember what that feels like, if you haven't. AND, I hope that you see you. Like, really SEE you. FEEL you.

Doing what you can to show up more fully in your relationships is a really good first step.

Not brushing off real compliments is another good place to start.

You're doing great. Keep showing up as you are. Keep working on what you're working on. Sometimes you gotta get a little deeper in the mud to really figure out what you're looking for... and then, sometimes it can be a little harder than you thought it would be for you to pull it into the light. You're right on time.

And don't forget, we're here to help if you need it - I know I did.

xoxo,

k

Ps: recently I had a client say: "Pain that isn't transformed, gets transferred." I liked that. So now it's in this email for you too.